As you are sitting there, reading this, wondering how it can help you in our dating life, think back, now, to those times you were either talking to a gorgeous woman, or wanted to but lacked the nerve or self-confidence to start a conversation.
When most guys talk to an attractive woman, or imagine themselves talking to an attractive woman, they begin to feel anxious and nervous, thinking about all the negative things that might happen. Commonly referred to as “approach anxiety,” this has stopped many men dead in their tracks, freezing them before they’ve been able to approach that gorgeous girl.
There are two powerful ways around this. One is your criteria, and other is hers. Your criteria are everything that is important to you in a woman. If all that is important to is physical attraction, it’s going to be tough to overcome that approach anxiety. Simply because when you look at her, you will convince yourself that she has everything you want, and you have to convince her somehow that you have what she wants. This essential gives her all the power, making it seem nearly impossible. Hence the anxiety.
But when you develop a list of things beyond the physical, you gain an incredible amount of power. Personality, religious beliefs, intelligence, both emotional and social, kindness level, life goals. All these will take away from the importance of her mere physical beauty. That way, when you and talk to her, you are seeing if she has what you want, rather than the other way around. This will give you incredible confidence and self esteem.
The second thing is to determine what her criteria are. For life, relationships, what she likes to do. The great thing about eliciting her criteria is that it takes care of several things at once. It will make her feel good, simply because people enjoy talking about what’s important to them. And it will allow you to determine if she is a good fit with you or not. And while she’s talking about the things she likes, and what’s important to her about those things, she will begin to associate those good feelings with being with you. If you repeat this with the same girl over a few dates, she will develop really deep and strong positive emotional feelings towards you.
When you develop these two skills, your confidence and self-esteem will skyrocket. You will notice that girls are noticing you more and more often. Within a few moments of speaking with you, girls will notice something different about you. Something incredibly attractive, something that they feel they have to find out more about.
Of course with your increase skills, it will become easier an easier to talk to beautiful girls and have them wanting to do what you ask. This can be great if you are honestly and ethically searching for that special someone. It can be terrible if you misuse these skills to create a successive string of sexual conquests for your own personal gain. That will invariably leave behind hurt feelings and damaged self-esteem. Be careful with your new skills.